Law & Order vs. Law & Order

So there's a Law & Order: UK. Apparently the 17 different American versions weren't enough, so they needed one based in London. Obviously this needs to be addressed.

Location

This is going to be tough, because the American versions of Law & Order take place in many locations. Except that none of them is London, and London is an awesome city. Have you ever been there? If it weren't so expensive, I would like to live there.

Round 1: UK

Actors

I have no idea who almost any of the actors in this show are other than that old guy in the TD commercials and Vincent D'Onofrio. If you watch the UK one without looking at the screen, it sounds like Jason Statham is one of the cops. Or bobbies. Do they still call police officers "bobbies" over there? It's been a while since I've been to London. Also, the girl who is testifying in this episode sounds like Natalie from Love Actually. Yeah, I like that movie, big whup, wanna fight about it? Now, while Jason Statham is pretty awesome, pretending to be Jason Statham is not. Those deceptive Brits...

Round 2: USA

Cases

I think all the cases in these shows are loosely based on reality. Or maybe they are now, but they didn't used to be. It doesn't matter. They are always pretty ridiculous.

Round 3: Tie

Accents

This is an easy category. The US characters all sound like Americans, and the UK ones have awesome British accents. Even if they are only using their accents for imitating Jason Statham in a vicious ruse. British accents are just more awesome than American ones.

Round 4: UK

Bonus Round

This is new to the Product Battle. It's sort of like the end of a round at Mario Party. Also, that comic is hilarious if you have ever played that game.

• The lawyers in the UK version wear hilarious wigs during the trial part. Point UK
• Vincent D'Onofrio is pretty awesome. Point US
• Both shows have that well-known Law & Order sound every time the scene changes location. No points awarded, but you should probably know that.

Winner

It's very unexpected, but the winner here is actually. . . no one! Law & Order sucks. I don't care if it's American, British, French, Russian, Japanese, it doesn't matter. Actually, Law & Order: Tokyo might be worth a watch. I am sure it's either already made or in the works. So, for those of you wanting a conclusion here, I have this to say: Ha! Deal with that!!

-Jon