What Should I Do?

What should I do?

Should I admit that I've made mistakes? I would have to make one first.

Should I remind you that I've done this before? Because I haven't. I'm not Brett Favre . . . in the retirement way, not the sending pictures of my dong to sluts who only are famous because they're hot and then get mad at you for only valuing them because of their looks way.

Should I give you a history lesson? Because I'm a history minor. Another aspect of my degree I'll probably never use.

Should I tell you how much fun we had? Well, more like how much fun you had reading my posts.

So . . . this is probably really awkward if you don't know what's going on yet.

Should I really believe I've ruined my legacy? I'm not sure I had a real legacy to ruin. Fuckcockdickballs. That's my legacy.

What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?

Should I go get a tattoo and then proceed to have it removed as some sort of apologetic gesture?

Do you want to see my shiny new shoes? I got them from DSW. They're pretty neat.

Should I just sell shoes? Shiny new shoes? Because I'm not sure I would make a very good shoe salesman. "Can I see these in a size 10?" "No, fuck off."

Should I tell you that I am not a role model? Please, you wish your kids has as much swag as me.

Seriously? What should I do?

Should I tell you that I'm a championship chaser? Because that wouldn't make any sense. That I did it for . . . uhhhhh, no money? For the rings? I hear the Mmmm franchise gives out rings for 1 year of service. I hope mine is the ring of power.

Should I be who you want me to be? That would be me playing by somebody else's rules . . . which I would never do.

Should I accept my role as the villain of Mmmm, opinions? "What you lookin' at? You all a bunch of fuckin' assholes. You know why? You don't have the guts to be what you wanna be? You need people like me. You need people like me so you can point your fuckin' fingers and say, That's the bad guy. So... what that make you? Good? You're not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie. Me, I don't have that problem. Me, I always tell the truth."

Maybe I should just disappear. God dammit, having the ring of power would be awesome.

Should I stop listening to my friends? They really had nothing to do with this blog, or know that it exists. STOP BLAMING THEM YOU MONSTERS!!!

Should I try acting? If that stupid fuck Robert Pattinson can be an actor I could probably do it. Then maybe Anne Hathaway would finally answer one of my letters without "Cease and Desist" at the top.

Should I make you laugh? I probably already do that with my awesome jokes and my quick wit.

Should we just clear the deck and start over? No fucking way, that's like playing "next goal wins" and that's for losers. Next thing you'll say we're all going to get trophies just for trying. Fuck that.

What should I do?

Should I be who you want me to be? Or should I just keep being fucking awesome?

Should I admit I was wrong and ask for forgiveness? Nah, screw that. I'm just going to keep being a fucking dick.

I'm back.

-Slick