UConn Women's Basketball and People That Annoy Me

Today my roommate called me a hater. Well, they say you should just do what you're best at and I enjoy getting angry at things that aren't really that big of a deal. Not really that angry but like pretend angry with lots of yelling and swearing. Whatever. Fuck it. Also I apologize in advance and ex post facto that my posts are so long. But you enjoy it . . . right?

UConn Women's Basketball:
Winning 71 games or whatever their streak will eventually be is impressive. Winning that many games in a row by an average of 30+ points is really impressive. I'm not going to deny that, but here's the thing: don't try to compare men's and women's basketball. They are in no way the same thing. Pat Summit owns the career record for most wins in NCAA Basketball. But she coaches women. When there are like 6 good teams it's not really that difficult to win that many games. Bob Knight's 903 wins are much more impressive because he wasn't the only fucking team out there. It's not the same thing. Now before you call me a sexist or say anything you can't take back just wait a minute. I said the same thing last week when the Division III coach passed Bob Knight. Don't act like they're the same thing. You have to take it for what it is. Is he the winningest men's coach in Division III history? Yeah but that doesn't mean that they're the same thing. Don't compare the UConn women's streak to the UCLA men's streak. The UConn women are exceptional at what they do, but if you want to compare them to a men's team have them play any NCAA men's team and see what happens. I bet they get absolutely crushed. So don't try to tell me that this is the most impressive college basketball team of all time because then you're belittling what it really means and turn it into some kind of joke where assholes like me write some opinion piece that no one reads. Also, women suck at basketball.

Bracketology:
If you've watched Sportscenter at any point this month you undoubtedly saw something about whether or not a team will qualify for the NCAA tournament. A fellow mmmmopinioner and I have disagreed about the value of these segments but this is my mmmmopinion and he is more than welcome to write his own. I don't like it. I don't need to know on February 16 whether or not Virginia Tech has done enough to qualify for the tournament because the season isn't over. Do you want to make the tournament? Win some more fucking games. No team has ever hurt their chances by winning a game. Besides, it changes every week depending on what you do that week so I just think it's fucking stupid. With that being said he correctly pointed out that it's a useful tool in comparing two teams because you can look at which team has a more impressive resume up to that point. I didn't think of that so I thank him for pointing it out. But here's why I hate it. This morning on Sportscenter Doug Gottlieb was giving his opinion on whether or not certain teams were in, if theoretically they released the brackets today. On the 9am version he had Illinois in the tournament. At 10am, he had them out of the tournament. WELL WHAT CHANGED DOUG? WHAT HAD ILLINOIS DONE IN AN HOUR TO WORK THEIR WAY OUT OF THE TOURNAMENT? Douchefuck.

Adding Gate to the end of every scandal:
It drives me absolutely batshit fucking crazy. It was called the Watergate scandal because it was the Watergate hotel complex. They didn't just add a random fucking word. What does Spygate mean? What's the gate in that? What does strippergate or hookergate or whatever they called it mean? What does Winegate have to do with a way to guard your property? Maybe it's the easiest way to refer to a scandal, but it makes me legitimately angry. I swear to god that if you use gate to refer to a scandal around me I will probably give you an angry look and use some language that will make your grandfather blush. It's probably on the Transformers 2 level of how much I hate it.

So that I don't die at age 26 from a heart attack/stress I'll again choose to end things on the lighter side. Today I was walking across campus between classes when I heard a fellow scholar utter the following sentence. Now be forewarned, I have absolutely no idea what this means or what context it could possibly be used in. But here goes: Excitedly talking to a group of friends she exclaimed, "But I'm just so super not-pregnant right now." I . . . just . . . don't even know.

-Slick